no longer in denial

it only took me two weeks after the last person to leave new zealand (mateja) left to realize that they aren't coming back. A Semester is over, and i won't be going to kristina and hannah's for grey's anatomy, i won't see martin and romain at breakfast, i won't travel with erin, kristin and ina again, and mateja will no longer be there to wish me sweet dreams at night.

i wish i didn't hold this back for so long. i think it may hurt even more now. i hate having to say goodbye. i miss them so much now.